Could your divorce benefit your kids?
Throughout the world of divorce, there is one pervasive message that strikes fear, guilt and regret into the hearts of divorcing parents in Las Vegas and throughout the country: divorce is harmful for children. While this is certainly true in some situations, it is not a hard and fast rule. In fact, divorce may actually benefit some children, according to psychologist and author Dr. Shoshanna Bennett.
Actually, Bennett says, divorce can make every member of the family happier. When parents are angry and frustrated with one another, no one in the family is happy. But when parents are able to leave their stressful marriage, they become happy again, and their children begin to be happier as a result.
In addition, a great deal of tension is removed from a home when parents split. Children will become less stressed and more relaxed, and their behavior will noticeably improve.
One of the most important duties parents have is to provide a model of a healthy relationship for their kids. If children grow up seeing parents who are angry and unhappy, they may believe that is what a relationship is supposed to be. In the alternative, Bennett says, if parents enter into fulfilling, loving relationships after divorce, they will be providing their children with a unique and important lesson on finding and maintaining healthy, happy relationships.
Finally, while the logistics of shared custody can be complicated, it can actually have a positive effect on the individual parent-child relationship. The child will get to experience each parent fulfilling all of the duties of parenting, and the relationship may improve as a result.
Source: The Huffington Post, “Divorce And Kids: 5 Ways Divorce Benefits Kids,” Dr. Shoshanna Bennett, May 18, 2012